04 January 2007

whose birthday?



yep... Dana's. Went up to the Bench Pub last night after work, wholly intent on grabbing a couple of amusement free, cheap ass boombas when all of the sudden in walks a drunk off her ass Dana. 



not so sure why that pic decided to be upside down, but fuck it, it illustrates a point dammit. So she bullshits with me about her eve and how some dude named Billy totally fucked up his chances at gettin some pussy by going to sleep early. my guess... he's teh ghey. or, she has a smelly crotch. but i'm thinkin more along teh ghey lines. so we start bullshitting and she regails me with a story of recurring dreams about a castle, then when she mentions the word "witch" she gives a cackle, not unlike the wicked the witch of the west, or east, i'm sure they both cackled. but not the north or south witches, they're the good ones.



so after trying to sort out drunkeneese about the sun burning people and her living under a castle in her dream we focused on the important shit. for example, how drunk can you look?



after handily proving that she can look wicked drunk (sticking your tongue out always helps. it means you're either drunk or dead) she again broke into story.



this time she informed about a bra shopping trip that left her somewhat happier. apparently she went in to the store thinking she wore a 34 C.



after the saleslady told her that she must be joking and that she absolutely must remeasure her, (insert lesbian fantasy here) it came out that Dana had in fact grown a full cup size



yeah, so she grabbed them in honor and that's her saying, "yep, they're d's". hehehehe. So, drunk girl spots her friend J-hill



who happens to be dating my neighbor, she also happens to be drunk grrrls ride, and she (dana) then proceedes to tell J-hill "IT'S MY BIRTHDAY!" Oddly enough, j-hill knew this already, imagine that? So, drunk girl spots another grrl, J-hen, 



and says the same thing. again, oddly enough, she knew as well. Man, small world. So, she then sees the bar owner



and asks him if he in fact is aware that it is her day of conveyance from the womb. he nods, tacitly expressing his knowledge, and promises her a drink or two on the morrow, when she is not so much drunk grrl. which by the way, is one of the first times i have seen said chick in said state. note to self... bring rufies next time. anyhow, as much as i hate it when she leaves, god i love watching her go.



sure, it's blurry, i was excited. go fuck yourselves.
hehehe, you know, if you put an L on the Dana you get DanaL. if you drop the D you get Anal. ha! you see that! i turned her name into a wonderful (yet sometimes dirty) act! ha! love ya dana. hehehehehe.

15 comments:

Kristin said...

Sounds like a great night.

Anonymous said...

Oh my goodness gracious!! A much less drunk Dana just woke up......and it's all coming rushing back!!! Lord have mercy!!

Anonymous said...

I was the drunks ride home, well I was her driver all night long!!! we had so much fun bar hopping last night. Happy Birthday Danal... Oh yeah and the "It's My Birthday was in an extreamly loud, high pitched voice. Kinda like a Jill voice if you know what that is.

Drunken Chud said...

Kristin, it was a good night. i wrestled a kid who was about 200lbs under my weight class and he wound up with his feet somewhere near the ceiling. and then the girls came in.

Anal, it was fuckin' hilarious. "HEY! IT'S MY BIRTHDAY!" then all quiet like, "oooh, i think i already told that person".heh.

jillbert, my bad. i knew that you were her ride, but my drunk mind couldn't quite put it down. and you're right, she was kinda jill voicing it.

I'm Scooter, but I might be a troll. said...

Holy crap. I need to meet this woman. Wow, super fun party time at the Chudder's haunts!

Rev said...

Upsidedownface rules!

Long live upsidedownface!

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Dana, congrats on the cup upgrade. They look great. Do me a favor, stuff them in my man Chud's face. He's good people, and he deserves such things.

Drunken Chud said...

scooter, she will not shit in your stockings.

rev, *slowly turning head at impossible angles*

ken, good lookin' out brother.

Steph said...

She's hot. You should ask her for a date. :P

Drunken Chud said...

i'm not her type steph. but, i'll keep her around in case she finds a hot single friend with low self esteem who LOVES fat guys. hehehehe.

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Well, I just came by to see if you posted again. You didn't, but it was worth looking at that chick's set one more time.

Drunken Chud said...

i was gonna post again, but then i, like you couldn't stand to see the pictures go away. hehehehhehe.

Anonymous said...

Steph,

Just for the record i love 'chud' I have a problem filling my life up with penis....sometimes you just need a friend like him....but if he wants to cuddle and watch a movie i'm up for that too!

Drunken Chud said...

yeah, i'm all hands when i cuddle. you may want to rethink that.

Anonymous said...

Just stopping in to get a good laugh...over a year ago and i still get a good laugh out of it.