Very Interesting

For those of you not familiar with the two gentlemen in the photograph, they are Mikhail Kalashnikov and Eugene Stoner. The sheer symbolism of this picture goes well beyond that of mutual respect. But more to the ability of man to overcome itself. Read up on the men, and realize on a larger scale what that picture represents to you.

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ok. enough thinking. now... time to enjoy some links.

Apparently, rumors were that the orginal Super Mario Bros. was laden with Communist propaganda. Somebody decided to REALLY make it blatant. this one of the better flash animations i've seen.

I want to party with this chick. she can pee, do a beer bong, chew bubble gum, and speak drunken jibberish all at the same time.

Carolyn Murphy, S.I. Supermodel, has a sex tape. here's 3 or so minutes of it. Gotta love a girl who knows how to please herself while on top. mmm mmm.

Easter Egg Hunt

So, every year, the family gets together and has an easter egg hunt. now, all of us are over 21, so, it's more of beer drinking while meandering the aunt's house looking for plastic eggs. funny thing is, my uncle writes up a list of where he hides the eggs so that we can find them should we, well, fail. last night, as we had all reached our quota a newcomer on the scene, my cousin's fiance, was two eggs short. we used the list, we scoured, we drank more, and more, and became complacent. we gave up. two eggs short. so, a few hours and a couple board games later i'm taking a leak and see one behind some potpourri cans. NOW WE'RE ONLY ONE SHORT! so, going over there today for easter dinner, and to try to find that last egg... i'm betting the little kids who hunt today are gonna find it. little punks.

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Happy Easter Jehova's Witnesses. THAT'S NOT PIOUS!

Do not watch this. it is not safe for work. you cannot unsee it.

grrr

angry drunken post about friends and betrayal, brewing. sad post about about wonton lust and not getting the girl, seeping through. happy post about seeing a girl i grew up with, even if she was with the guy whose ass i had to kick 3 months ago or so, bubbling. fuck it. so i had these friends. had being the operative word. we tried going into business together, we formed a company, they, after we had a meeting and discussed time frames, decided to renege on discussed time frames, then talk to the lawyer behind my back (which i had to talk my way out of a $400 bill thank you) to get themselves out of the company. well, after doing this, they then decided to empty the company account. which, i told them up front i would give them the cash, if they asked for it. but they stole it. period. behind my back, closed the company account. currently i'm deciding on legal action, since i am within my rights to do so. but, i haven't decided. anyhow, so they clean out the account, and sign over their shares 5 months in advance of the drop dead date we had set. i guess i thought peoples word's were worth something. so, they get engaged (presumably with the stolen money) and are now looking at a house to purchase. how did i find out about the house? well, we were hanging out and i was checking out the digital camera they had and scrolling through the pics and noticed a pic of a house. with a for sale sign in the yard. i asked, they hesitated, i knew. but they said it was a house they looked at. at least their hesitation tells me they feel guilty about being shitheads. so, then i see who their agent is in the pics. abviously it's not me, cuz, well, the screwing never stops, it's a guy i prompted to get into the biz about a year ago at my birthday. the problem here isn't that they wanted to go their seperate ways, i can dig that. it's that they went about it all behind my back and thought i wouldn't notice. like i'm a fucking retard. like the lawyer doesn't immediately call me when they call about this shit that fucking day. then a few weeks later they decide to tell me. i already knew assholes. like the bank doesn't call me as soon as they close the account, which by the way they have never said boo about. so fuck em. if that's how they conduct themselves, i'm glad their out now, instead of later. dead weight... gone. friends... done. don't need em.

as for the second thing that was seeping... fuck it. i have no game. i am in the friend zone. she's rad enough i can dig that, but it will take a while. not everyone can see me as the sexy bitch i see myself as. hehe. meh, fuck it, this drunk ass is out. if ever i get too cocksure, someone please remind of this whiney bitch ass post and put me back in place. who knew booze turned me into a fuckin balless pussy.

I'm a sexy pirate.

[00:08] vicecityrocks: hi... nyone there?
[00:09] Findlaytex: is this gonna be spam?
[00:09] vicecityrocks: lol, im not spammiing you.
[00:09] Findlaytex: whew.
[00:09] vicecityrocks: oh your there :) zi...
[00:09] Findlaytex: heh. been getting a lot of IM spam lately.
[00:09] vicecityrocks: a/s/l (age sex lpcation)?
[00:10] Findlaytex: 27 male detroit. you?
[00:10] vicecityrocks: im 27/f/USA. was lookin at your profile. thought you migght like to chat.
[00:10] vicecityrocks: so what have you beenn up to findlaytex?
[00:11] Findlaytex: not a whole heck of a lot.
[00:11] Findlaytex: workin. drinkin.
[00:11] vicecityrocks: cool. i was just hangin out watching tv. i was getting kinda horny :) (*blushes))
[00:11] vicecityrocks: oh no not work... thats a 4 letter word yoi know..
[00:11] Findlaytex: heh.
[00:11] Findlaytex: yes, i do know.
[00:11] vicecityrocks: feel like a little cyber fun wih me ? please please...
[00:11] Findlaytex: sure why the hell not.
[00:12] Findlaytex: just so you know, i'm a pirate.
[00:12] Findlaytex: eye patch, and all.
[00:12] Findlaytex: but a sexy pirate.
[00:13] vicecityrocks: alright :) how bouut i get down on my knees in front of you and help you out of your pants?
[00:13] Findlaytex: well, you know how to start a party don't. you? let me help you with the belt.
[00:13] vicecityrocks: tell me what ou want me to do with you while i slip out of my panties
[00:13] vicecityrocks: oh yeah babe.. dont stop. while i slide my hand down between my llegs and part my moist lips
[00:13] vicecityrocks: oh it feels so good. Im holding your pulsing cock in my hand, my shiny red fingernails dig gently into your bals, while my full, soft lips engulf the mass of your meat
[00:13] vicecityrocks: open my website so you can lopk at me while im sucking you. use the link in my profile!
[00:16] Findlaytex: wow, you're kinda hit. can't you send stacy or elisabeth my way?
[00:16] Findlaytex: maybe both of them.
[00:16] Findlaytex: they would love my fat rolls and small cock.
[00:18] Findlaytex: nothing? is the party over?
[00:19] Findlaytex: i'm sorry. i AM the face of E.D.
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yeah, so that's what you get when i haven't been drinking and someone spams me. god i love spammers. so, went to the Wings game tonight, we wooped some ass and took the presidents trophy outright. so fuck all y'all lesser teams. other than that, nothing new going on. lately i've been less of a drunken chud and more of a sober chud. this has to do with my lack of money which is due to my lack of gainful employment. well, any employment really. so, you'll all know when i have money cuz the drunken rambling posts will be a plenty.

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ALL LINKS POP

If you ignore the dumbasses behind the camera, the outcome is hilarious.

Did he just knock himself out? good thing the ref called it.

Ok, this is kinda cool. Game 6 of the '86 series between BoSox and NyMets. re-enacted on RBI baseball, with the original call from the game. (8 1/2 minutes long).

Stick it up ya Jaxie you jizz faced gobshites

[13:42] Ashley k 5937: Hey you
[13:44] FindlayTex: is this gonna be spam?
[13:44] Ashley k 5937: Whatup go to 92ir82pg7jwv33CuddleCove.compio9v62w8e7u156
[13:44] FindlayTex: gah! ya got me!
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well, i got nothin. hopefully i will bless you all with a nice drunken post this evening. otherwise, all you get today is links! w00t. and watch out, i just learned how to make my links pop up in new windows. so now i'm teh l337!

do not stick things in your urethra. this video will tell you why not.

What is the easter bunny doing the other 364 days? KICKIN' ASS!

if this were a real dealership commercial, i'd so buy from them. (nsfw language)

hehehe. marry lou retton he is not. dumbass.

i'm not too entirely sure who torrie wilson is. but she get's knocked the fuck out!

dude tries to eat 50 cadbury eggs. gets to 25, then rapidly loses 20. the sheer volume of vomit at the end... GOLD! cool hand luke he is not.

Cinco De Mayo?????

For the last few evenings I have seen a poorly made and, extremely hilarious commercial for a local municipality. This commercial is for, you guessed it: Cinco de Mayo! It’s just now April... and they're running a commercial for Cinco de Mayo. You don't even get that kind of dedication to St. Pat's. Now, the funniest part is the small as shit (2 miles wide by about 6 miles long), and pretty much a 50/50 split between black and white trash township that's having the "cinco de mayo fiesta". Yes kids, I’m talking about Redford. Redford is our Detroit buffer. It’s not as shitty as Detroit, but it's not as nice as the rest of the area. The thing is, I don't think there's a Mexican contingent in Redford at all. sure, there's the golf courses, so of course there's laborers, but I don't think that qualifies as a large enough contingent to have a Cinco de Mayo 2 day event. As far as I know, there aren't even any Mexican restaurants in Redford. So, while all of these thoughts were flying through my head I continued watching the commercial. There is a great graphic you can hardly see of the band "Monumental Mariachi Cora! With smarmy looking men around a man who could quite possibly be the Alcalde. That gives way to a graphic for the band "Caporales de la Sierra!”, then they say something about Mexican food and there are two Mexicans standing in what looks a funnel cake booth. Next is some cut away shots of fat white kids followed by some shots of little black and white kids (I am pausing the tivo to try to find Mexicans right now since it came on again whilst I was typing this). Oooh a shot of a tall Mexican and some shitty "fair" sombreros and more fat white people in biker jackets. And that's pretty much the whole commercial. HOWEVER! During this whole thing, as I am staring with my mouth agape, there is an announcer giving normal commercial commentary on everything. The announcer is the best part. The coup de grâce. It’s basically a white dude, holding his nose, doing the absolute WORST Speedy Gonzalez impersonation evar! I keep replaying this piece of trash and laughing my ass off. I absolutely have to go to this atrocity. I will have big wet burritos, and wear sombrero's and drink mucho dos equis and tequila while the real Mexicans that were bused in as entertainment look on in horror as a fat white man with an eye patch (of course I’ll have the pirate eye patch on) bastardizes their culture. I will say (see: drunkenly yell) things like "Mas cervesas por favor!!!!!" and yell sing/fake the words to "la bamba". But then, I’m a cad and this celebration has about as much to do with Mexican independence as it does the war over Toledo. VIVA LA REVOLUCION!
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i don't know what to say to this:

[04:55] Ndaydream69: hi, 19/f bi curious and 26/m findlay, ohio, bored wana chat maybe meet up sometime
[04:56] FindlayTex: can i bring a friend?
[04:56] Ndaydream69: sure
[04:56] FindlayTex: she's fat.
[04:57] Ndaydream69: maybe just have you at first though if that is ok?
[04:57] FindlayTex: i'm fat.
[04:58] Ndaydream69: lol, funnny, not into games bye
[04:58] FindlayTex: bye
[04:58] FindlayTex: but i really am fat.
[04:59] Ndaydream69: you bi curious?
[04:59] FindlayTex: not even a little bit.
[05:00] FindlayTex: sorry.
[05:01] Ndaydream69: cool
--------

and now some linkies:

Hehehehe. the squirrel shows the deer how he rolls.

i think the point of doing a backflip into a pool is more "out" than "up". woops.

worst. wrestler. evar.

i have never been so bored that i thought wrapping a ceiling fan in barbed wire and then hopping up into sounded like fun. this guy has.

this guy is my circle puking hero.

Kind of a neat meme from De Style Lady

Favorite Artist meme:
Choose a band or artist; and answer a bunch of questions using only titles of their songs.

Well, i gotta go with Gwar on this one

1. Are you male or female? Slutman City

2. Describe yourself: Black and Huge

3. How do some people feel about you: Dirty, Filthy

4. How do you feel about yourself: Sex Cow

5. Describe your ex boyfriend / girlfriend: Fire in the loins

6. Describe your current significant other: None but the Brave

7. Describe where you want to be: Pussy Planet

8. Describe how you live: Rock & Roll Party Town

9. Describe how you love: Sexecutioner

10. What would you ask for if you had just one wish: Sex Cow

11. Share a few words of wisdom: Hate Love Songs

12. Now say goodbye: The Road Behind

so, now i tag:

Laura
Cwik
Scooter
Stepho!
And the lovely and talented Kristin

No Mr. Bond, I expect you to die.

I want a houseboat. or at least a cabin cruiser. something i can sail around the world in, evading Somali pirates, and weathering squalls all while talking like a pirate and just generally being the coolest kid in the league. i mean, a houseboat would rock. i may not be able to sail the open ocean in it, but fuck, how pimp would that be? i mean what's a better come on than, "what hospital were you born in?" easy, "hey baby, wanna see my houseboat?" "yep, just like MacGyver." and i mean really, how fuckin cool is MacGyver? that's instant pimp status. fuckin feng shui the shit outta that house boat and the women would be lining up in droves. once they sat down in the houseboat and saw how awesome its awesomeness is, you'd need a fucking spatula to get them off the seat. plus, if you want to do anything illegal in your house, you just drive out into international waters. then w00t! all hands on deck! it's time for a sexy party! hoist the jolly roger, tell women to remove their tops or walk the plank. the plank being a little board that leads to the hot tub. plus the true advantage of a houseboat; should anyone try to deviously kill me with a bomb, then i could potentially survive if i dive into the water, well, assuming that i found the bomb or uncovered the plot in time. whatever, i'll have surveillance in my boat to alert me to the potential threats that may be perpetrated on me. so, when i get my houseboat, all of you are invited to the sexy parties. there will be beer provided, but you must provide your own liquor.

Fuckin' Creek Kids.

I love my creek kids. fuck you for judging me!

Woops, got tagged again,

so i got tagged by auburn. and i'm just now getting around to doing this. sorry baby. i'll be more prompt next time.

How old were you when you lost your virginity? Who was it to? Describe the event.

Hrmm... 2 weeks after turning 16. oh yeah. she was some guy's girlfriend however she was in MY english class. it was great. she wasn't a virgin, i was, she knew what she was doing, and it was played well. after me losing some feeling in my cock due to errant teeth i lasted a phenomonal 45 minutes. well, 44 to be exact. 44 minutes till the feeling came back in my cock, then one minute thereafter. oh yeah!

What is the strangest place you've had sex?

i can't think of single place that is "strange" to have sex. funerals, nope. morgues... nope. hospitals, nope. feminist rallies, nope. i got nothin.

Who would you consider switching teams for?

sean connery, circa 1967. hands down. i'd suck that scott's cock like a goddamn blowpop back then. or something less gay...

Do you prefer to give or receive?

honestly, receive. i mean, i love licking box. i'm a huge fan of it. but if i had my choice of licking box and gettin head... yeah, i'd opt for the head every day of the week. what can i say, i like gettin mine as much as i like given her hers.

One night stands. What's the protocol…stay the night or get the hell outta there?

depends on the situation. i mean, if it's a solid booty call, you can stay. but if it's a true booty call, you gotsta get the fuck out. otherwise the next night she's going to be calling you boyfriend, and calling you like psycho.

Favourite body part/parts of the opposite sex?

ass, legs, the small of the back as it slopes to the ass... the belly as it firms to your touch... the nipples as they harden when your lips glide over them...

really, there's not much i don't love about the opposite sex.

Quickie or long and slow?

how can you favor one over the other? i mean each has their places in the sexual heirarchy. the passion of a quickie vs. the connection of a long and slow meeting of the groins. they both have their places, and they both have their pros and cons. i mean there, have been days where it's like 4 quickes in an hour. you get that look from the other and BOOM, there ya go. of course i've had those days where you don't feel like getting out of bed and just slow fucking all day. so... who cares. both i say!

Noisy or quiet?

NOISY NOISY NOISY NOISY NOISY NOISY NOISY!!!!! and that's all i have to say about that. i like em loud. i like makin' em loud.

Ideal amount of sex per week?

this is tangible? you can quantify this? i think not. my ideal amount? when my cock falls off or i can't feel it anymore.

What's your number one sexual turn off?

if they don't like fat guys... i'm out.

Number one arousal trigger?

a girl who likes fat guys. DUH!

What constitutes bad sex?

no sex.

Celebrity you would love to shag right now?

wait, there's a celebrity i shouldn't want to shag?

Define sexy?

me. enough said. though, i guess the female definition would be kristin. *winks to future wife*.

The best sex you ever had.

heh, wow, well, i can't name names since she has found this blog, and well, i haven't seen her in like 6 years... ish. but anyhow, her name was k**** and wow. oh wait, i wasn't gonna name names. meh, when have i been a man of my word. basically we had sex for the pure enjoyment. we were both very passionate people and that was what the sex was. no love. no emotion. just passion for sex. i mean, it was just pure human to human intimate contact. without asking we knew what buttons to push. it was pure, and we were good at what we did. it was just sex, and great sex at that. i once made her stand while i went down on her. i held her hands behind her back while i knelt and did what i wanted to do. she kept protesting as the climax grew... but i wouldn't relent. period... best pussy i've ever tasted. best girl i've slept with. hands down. wow...

ok then. good trip down memory lane...

Oh, the tagging...

Laurie
Stepho!
Kristin
Heidi
Rev

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[04:10] Serena: ethiopian food is supposed to be sooo good
[04:10] Serena: we will have to try it
[04:11] FindlayTex: you know, i have heard that about ethiopian.
[04:11] FindlayTex: but i laugh and imagine going to a place, only be starved and put up for adoption by sally struthers.
[04:12] Serena: odd to think of delicious food coming out of a totally overly impovershed country
[04:12] Serena: you get glasses of muddy unfiltered water.
[04:12] Serena: grubs and sticks.....lol
[04:12] FindlayTex: lol
[04:13] FindlayTex: and a train that constantly runs through it.
[04:13] Serena: lol